Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

How do police officers feel about the fear they instill into criminals?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

United Switches Off Starlink Internet on Regional Jets After Static Problem - WSJ

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What questions will be asked by the executive director of JP Morgan for 6 years of experience in Java? The technical rounds are already cleared.

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

How do I maintain and care for granite countertops in a coastal climate like Pompano Beach?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why does he text me first but when I never text first he gets mad?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t buy bullshit

How do you feel about Donald Trump signing an executive order that says there are only two genders?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I see through liars

When British people write X after everything, are they being serious or trying not to be awkward?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What is the best way to get my wife to become a hotwife?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Final Fantasy Tactics is at long-last getting a remaster for Xbox and PC, and its got a release date - Windows Central

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t cotton to rapists

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have a reading level above third grade

I can count

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I actually pay taxes

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can read

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP